How is one suppose to know who, when and where is the rape going to occur? Hindsight is 20/20. How many dates have you being on and places have you been that would have resulted in rape had the other party being a rapist? How many women regularly engage in risky behaviors such as getting drunk etc and never get raped? Ask the rape victims and the circumstances are varied. All behavior is a risky behavior for a rapist -save staying in your home fortified, alone, and constantly vigilant for a possible assault- don't get the plumbing fixed, don't have a sofa delivered. Dating is extremely risky. No woman would ever date if she wanted to avoid being at risk. I think as to a man inadvently raping a woman by mistaking the signals, again you are confusing rape with sex, when a man spikes a drink he knows perfectly well that there is no consent. The reality is that it is pretty easy to know when someone wants to have sex. The fact is that the risk and fatal flaw is being a woman that has being targeted by a rapist.
Frankly, it is worse when you know all these people know what has been done to you and they simply do nothing and sometimes worse than nothing. It is nicer to believe that if you just had ...[insert here your self blame and other's blame of what you should have done and when] then it wouldn't have happened to you. Of course, the victim is responsible because what else can be expected for rapists to do than rape. Rapists want to rape and the victim doesn't want to be raped therefore the victim has the guilt for not avoiding the rape. It is what it amounts to.
The fact is that the risk and fatal flaw is being a woman (less commonly a man) that has being targeted by a rapist.These are evil evil people. True evil in that the motivation is simply to damage, to inflict pain on others. Yeah, you can psychologize that they are inferior as men thus they rape to make themselves feel like they are something but reasons are not excuses and they are the most cowardly since they not only abuse someone's body but use drugs to rob a person's mind at least with a gun or a knife a rapist is respecting your mind and acknowledging that you are unwilling.
I thought about why would another individual other than the rapist would risk their job for another person to harass me specially with a DVD containing a porn clip and threatening content such as a corpse with stick up the privates and bones in a forest floor which reminds one when bodies are found in the woods. I guess the message was that I was going to be raped again and murdered this time. Rather serious so I concluded that this person must be drugging and raping himself so has a vested interest in threatening me. I was told by the airline that I could not work if I felt unsafe so I could not say that I felt threatened and the investigator herself did not feel threatened or harassed by the contents of the DVD. Another point of interest is that the airline´s investigator said that prints cannot be lifted from a DVD disc when I can plainly see the prints and why wasn´t the security tape from Quito used when it shows the individual placing the DVD in my suitcase. I even wonder if that individual was ever even asked about it just as the witneses I gave from other incidents were never questioned. It became clear to me from the first time I reported the harassment that there was no way it was ever going to be acknowledged but I was stupid enough to believe that it was in the airline´s own interests to put an end to the sexual assaults being committed by its employees and there are lots of ways to handle that if you want to do the right thing instead they choose to cover for the rapists because the rapists are everywhere and they have the goods on people. These people have been getting away with sexual assault and they become more dangerous each time.
The effort and pain that it takes to come forward. You suspect that there must be something wrong with you to have been picked as a victim. Very few rapes are brought to any sort of justice or have any cost for the rapists so it is not surprising that the epidemic continues despite that we keep telling people to report and they just end up revictimized. A lesson I have learned from this is not to expect any help and to help yourself. Unfortunately, it takes all of what has happened in addition to the rape to come to that realization. A lot of us seem to be naive, unequipped to respond to aggression with the belief in the goodness of humanity and that makes us targets. I know I was such a person before the rape and this is what the rape has taught me not to be. I have said that I always knew there were rapists but I never knew there were so many people willing to assist rapists. Blackmail or whatever, I don't care what the excuse is. I would definitely do things differently if I knew then what I know now.